Saturday, September 20, 2014

Salon Paws

"This is by far, the worst spa treatment I have ever received in my life," Coco said as I wrapped her in a warm towel. 

We had just finished up her leg stretch and thigh massage session, and now it was time for a little warm relaxation.

"Girly, you've never been to a day spa that wasn't owned and operated by yours truly." 
I've been trying to make a habit of pampering Coco lately with daily coat brushing and back rubs.

"Shows what you know, idiot. Back in '93 I was employed at a little joint called 'Golden Fingers.' I found the gig thumbing through the want ads in the paper, and figured it was perfect for me considering their willingness to hire just about anyone. 'WE HIRE ANYONE' was the only description under the listing."

I let out a long sigh.

Coco kicked me from under the towel. "As I was saying, I showed up for the interview that never took place, and next thing you know they have me hopping back and forth on the backs of hairy business men, misting them with essential oils. I don't know, it all smelled like urine to me. But anyway, fortunately they had towels lain across their asses, because I had a tendency to slip through the cracks if you catch my drift."

It was useless to argue, and her eyes were beginning to close. "Wow Coco, why on earth did you ever leave such a fantastic job?" 

"Some fatso with a Micky D's franchise pinched my tail on his way out. The next time he came in for a massage, I bit his nipple clear off. Not surprisingly...I was given a warning. But then they caught me stealing money from the tip jar the following week, so I was fired."

"Well Cokes, you do have a pretty rough track record with staying employed, so this doesn't exactly surprise me. Anyway my darling, just relax and try to enjoy yourself. You deserve the pampering." I bent over and kissed her forehead.

"Doesn't this shit come with bottomless mimosas or something?" Coco said, her eyes still closed.

I laughed. "How could I be so unaccommodating? Coming right up, madame."

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